Momma, what's love?
by Joermungard
Summary: A dialogue between Bella and Renesmee about love. Just a few thoughts, really, about the way Jake and Nessie feel about each other.


**Disclaimer: I'm not Stephenie Meyer, I don't own anything (except my own imagination), and I'm not making any money out of this. I'm just having some fun with Miss Meyer's characters.**

Basic idea: Bella is putting Nessie to sleep, and Nessie starts to ask some questions about love and our favourite werewolf. Basically, this is just a bunch of thoughts about love, in dialogue-form. **  
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"Mommy? Why is Jake keeping away from us lately?"

"Because he's afraid, honey."

"What's he afraid of?"

"Of love, honey."

"Why, momma? What's there to be afraid of in love?"

"It's hard to say. Love is different for each of us. But I think that Jake is afraid because he loves you very, very much, and he's afraid you might not love him the same way."

"But I do love him!"

"I know you do. But you see, there's different kinds of love. There's the way that I love Alice – she's my best friend, and I love her because she's always there. There's the way daddy loves Alice – she's his sister, and he loves her for everything they've been through together, long before you and I existed. There's the way I love you – you're my child, you're part of me, and I am part of you, and that's why we love each other. And there's the way daddy and I love each other – we're soulmates, we're two parts of the same whole, we were made for each other."

"What's that got to do with me and Jake?"

"Well - Jake loves you in all of these ways at once. And I think he may be afraid because he thinks he loves you too much."

"Why would that be too much? Can you love too much?"

"No, honey. You can never love too much. But it can be very hard, sometimes, when you love someone very, very much, and that person doesn't love you back, or doesn't love you the same way."

"But if Jake loves me in all the ways, then I do love him the same way – because he's my brother, and he's my best friend, and I love him like that."

"Yes, he loves you in all the ways. But he's starting to love you more and more the way your daddy and I love each other, the way Alice and Jasper and Emmett and Rosa and Esme and Carlisle love each other. And he's terrified that one day, he'll love you just that way, and no other way, and you will still love him the way you do now – as a friend and a brother."

"Why is he starting to love me differently?"

"Because you're growing up. You're becoming a woman."

"Why does that change things?"

"Because growing up changes people. It changes the way they look at the world, and it changes the way the world looks at them. And it changes the way they love and are loved, too."

"Does that mean that I'll start loving Jake like you love daddy?"

"It doesn't have to mean that. Nothing in this world is certain or predetermined. If it's right for you, you may fall in love with Jake. Or you may not."

"I want to fall in love with him. I don't want to make him unhappy."

"It doesn't work that way, honey. You can't choose who you fall in love with. You're not supposed to. And you could never make Jake unhappy – he loves you too much to want to force you to do anything, not even to love him."

"But if there's a chance that I might fall in love with Jake – why isn't he around to make sure I do?"

"Because he doesn't want to pressure you, he wants you to have the choice who to love. He loves you the way only a werewolf can love someone, and because he loves you so, so much, he wants you to be happy. He wants you to be happy so bad that he'd do anything to make sure you are, he'll even stay away from you though it breaks his heart."

"I don't want him to be heartbroken. I want him happy too. And I'm not happy when he's not around."

"You should tell him. Tell him you miss him. I know he means well by keeping away, but really, he should know better. Staying away doesn't help. Whatever happens, he'll just have to brave it out."

"What do you mean, staying away doesn't help?"

"Well – years ago, when I was still human, your daddy left me for a while, because he thought I should have a normal human life. But it didn't change a thing – I still loved him, and he still loved me, and all the separation did was make us both feel like we were missing a piece of ourselves. And it's the same with Jake – he won't stop loving you just because he doesn't see you all the time, and you won't change the way you feel about him either. If you're meant to be together as man and woman, rather than as friends, it will happen, and if it's not meant to be, it won't. Jake thinks that by staying away for a while, he can give you all the options – you could fall in love with him, or you could fall in love with someone else. But really, your heart will do what it wants, no matter if he's here or not."

"It doesn't seem fair, momma. Why doesn't he get a choice, too?"

"Because that's the way he was made. But don't worry, honey. He doesn't mind not having a choice. Loving you makes him so happy that he doesn't mind."

"But you said it's hard for him."

"It is. But at the same time, it's easy. Easy as breathing. Love is strange that way, honey – it can be very, very hard, but very, very easy at the same time. Even if you hated him, loving you would still be the most wonderful feeling for him."

"I'm glad I don't hate him. I could never hate him."

"I know, honey. I'm glad about that too. I love Jake too, you know, and I'm glad you want to see him happy."

"Momma?"

"Yes, honey?"

"Will you be sad when I grow up?"

"A little. I'll miss you being my little girl. You grow up so fast, sometimes it's hard because I don't get as much childhood with you as other mothers do. But at the same time, I'm so curious to see what you'll be like when you're an adult that I can't wait for it. In the end, I think the scale is even. Of course, I'll miss having a baby girl. But then again, I'll have a big girl, and that's just as good, or maybe even better, who knows."

"I'm glad. --- Momma?"

"Yes?"

"What does it feel like, to love someone the way you love daddy?"

"Just you wait, it's the best feeling in the world. It's like... like running with the wind, and feeling the sun on your skin, and seeing a beautiful picture, and catching the first snowflake, all rolled into one and a thousand times better. When you love someone like that, you can't wait to see them in the morning, and you can't wait for the evening to come so you can go to bed and see them first thing in the morning all over. Your heart feels like it's too big for your chest, and at the same time, it feels like it doesn't belong in your chest any more, because it belongs to the person you love. And it's so many other things that I can't even explain. But you'll find out soon, I'm sure. One day, you'll be looking at someone and realise that you never want to look away again, the stars will dance and the planets will sing only for you, and you'll just know. You'll just KNOW."

"I can't wait for that day. I really hope it's Jake."

"We'll see, honey. We'll see."

"Good night, Momma."

"Good night, Renesmee."


End file.
